i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
