Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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