Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
