my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize