I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
