I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Randomize