my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize