his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
