when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Randomize
