Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
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