Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
