i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
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