what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
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