yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
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