i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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