I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
operation have a gay friend backfired
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
