Grow some girl-balls and come out already
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
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