i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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