theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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