hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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