I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
