I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
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