I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
me + whiskey = a bad person
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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