me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
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