You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Randomize
