So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
