Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it