best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize