dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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