Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
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