You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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