adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
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