i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
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