sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
