does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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