i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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