Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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