just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
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