Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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