I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
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