We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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