honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Randomize
