You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
