hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
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