New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize