office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
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