ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Randomize
