He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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