The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
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