I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
We were destined to go to rehab together
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
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