you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
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