all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize